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Sunday, June 25, 2006

trey, you were loved

this morning.
it's two am and im tired. an hour long drive home ahead of me. i decide to check my messages before leaving b/c the internet at my house is down. weird message from a student, asking if i knew a kid named trey...

rewind two years. it's my first year teaching. nervous. excited. love my kids. trey, who didnt like if i called him walter, his first name, was a funny kid who liked to make that sarcastic remark at the exact moment that it was appropriate. it was his job to entertain me in class. and, like all my kids, i loved him. missed homework assignments? you know it. failed a test here or there? sure. but i loved him . . .

fast forward to april 2006. i'm meeting students to go see akeelah and the bee. waiting in line to get a ticket, i glance through the glass and see a somewhat familiar face outside. the face is hidden by shaggy hair, and the young man is a bit taller than the boy i remember knowing, but it's him. i knew it. and he saw me. and he knew it. i went outside, gave him a hug, and we talked. he had just turned in an application at the theater. i mentioned a cd i had just finished making. he said he wanted one. we headed over to my car while he finished his cigarette. "sorry for smoking in front of you."
"dont worry about it." and i smiled as i handed him the cd, explaining that it was crap, but i hope he'd like it.
he said thanks, and we said goodbye.

fast forward to two days ago. trey sent me a message saying that he kept the akeelah and the bee poster for me. (he got the job at the theater) he said for me to just call him to get the poster.

yesterday. trey drowned at tybee.

trey, everyone is asking "why?" i know i am. but at this point, all i know is that you were loved.

we miss you, and hopefully we'll meet again someday.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

cant sleep...

so it's about 1 in the am and i cant sleep. usually, i wouldnt care seeing as how im a night owl anyhow, but this time it's annoying.

it's raining outside, and i love it. i love the smell of rain. i love lightening. i love thunder.

this time of year always seems to be a time of renewal and of new beginnings. old friends. new friends. im excited to see how this summer will turn out.

i recently confessed to God that havent been so wise as of late. i've made a lot of mistakes. been friends with people i probably shouldnt have been friends with. and now i'm trying to figure out what that means and where to go from here, b/c the fact is, i cant go anywhere. how do you re-invent your surroundings when you cant leave?

im going through withdrawl. i miss my students.

maybe if i go stand out in the rain, it will wash it all away...